Friday, July 07, 2006

“"Will you walk into my parlor?" said the Spider to the Fly; "'Tis the prettiest little parlor that ever you did spy”



So the picture you see above is that of the Brown Recluse Spider. Here is some info on it. I've been finding these little suckers all over my house. Well, more like in my closet and garage. Ocassionally one wanders out into "human territory", only to be crushed under my mighty heel. They're pretty dangerous but I have confidence that I won't be bitten because I know the FACTS. And as we all know fear is rooted in the unknown. I've captured one and he is currently residing under a glass mug in a corner of my room. I haven't decided what to do with him yet and it's been two weeks since I caught the little bastard in my closet. Maybe a science experiment where I see how long he can hold out without food. The only thing I've decided is that I can't name him, because that would just create a bond between us and I wouldn't be able to dispatch him as easily. He won't do much in his 8-ounce world, just wait for the reaper. Or my heel, whichever comes first.
For those of you who are not squeamish, and I really mean it cause these pics are not pretty, here is a picture of a bite, and here is a couple more. This site is actually interesting. It chronicles a brown recluse bite from beginning to end.

On a side note, speaking of squeamish I can't help to be reminded of my roommate Noah, who is so squeamish he can't even cut a raw steak. Seriously.


On a lighter note, This guy should've kept his arms up.

13 Comments:

At 11:17 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Some of those bites are just nasty looking. Liberate the snake...i mean spider! Liberate him to a painful death!

 
At 6:19 AM, Anonymous Kristy said...

OMG Dave, I'm laughing like a maniac at work. You take the comedy crown in the family. A million times more entertaining than anyone else's. Golf clap to you.

 
At 8:48 AM, Anonymous honest injun said...

I feel bad for the spider... he's in captivity against his own will. Just kill him !!! It'll make things easier, that way you can't bond with him.

 
At 7:30 PM, Blogger Josue' said...

I vote to make that arachnid suffer....His cousins have put a hurt'n on too many humans....

You may want to hit up Home Depot or Lowe's and get an insect spray and spray the perimeter of your living quarters or maybe the thought of a recluse walking on your face as you sleep has some sort of appeal..... :p

 
At 11:56 PM, Blogger Dave said...

Like I said, cuz, I know the facts. The way my bed is positioned in my room would make it highly unlikely that a recluse would happen upon it. Plus my room is clean and they usually don't wander across open ground. I also keep a ring of spider heads impaled on toothpicks around my bed as a warning. The spiders are wary, not I. Plus I've interrogated Prisoner 0001. Apparently he's some kind of bigwig in the recluse community. I'm currently in negotiations with them so I don't think a trip to Home Depot or Lowe's will be necessary to rid my house of the recluse threat. Not if they want their buddy back, at any rate.

 
At 1:44 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

*this one's for you, kristy*
Liberate the snaaaaake!

 
At 8:37 AM, Blogger Josue' said...

I don't think they are coming for the POW any time soon and I'm not sure diplomacy will yield the desired result...

 
At 3:49 PM, Blogger The D said...

I should report you to PETA! That spider has a right to be free and to cause necrotic wounds on your ass! You are like the US and their secret torture prisons all over the world! Oh, and Wasim will not visit the South on account of that little spider. Never have I seen a man so terrified by spiders.

 
At 4:21 PM, Anonymous Kristy said...

Thanks, mike. :p

 
At 10:12 AM, Blogger Antonio said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

 
At 8:24 AM, Blogger Antonio said...

Ok dude. I just had a horrible effin nightmare last night involving spiders. Thanks, dick.
Creed rocks.

 
At 9:47 AM, Blogger The Persian said...

I read about one of the most recently publicized bites, and saw the pics of the guy's hand. They scared the shit out of me (I'm afraid of even everyday harmless spiders), but I was under the impression they are not so common

"I've been finding these little suckers all over my house"

*scared shitless now*

Thanks a lot!! I probably won't sleep so well tonight thanks to your informative post.

:)

 
At 1:35 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

NSU - 4efer, 5210 - rulez

 

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